I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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