I wish i was in the wii world.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
Randomize
