I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
Dear sober self, your keys are on the table in front of you the only way your typing this is with autocorrect goodnight love you
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
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