i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
