we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
