didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
Randomize
