I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
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