Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
are you so shy because you have an std?
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Randomize
