it's too hot outside to masturbate.
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
Randomize
