it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
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