you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
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