Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
