discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
Randomize
