what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
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