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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
My feet surprised me
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
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