You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Randomize
