I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
Randomize