just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Randomize
