don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
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