Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
Randomize