Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
I'm sitting next to this guy at the bar. I wrote him a little song in my head it goes "there is no fucking chance you're getting in my pants" gonna sing it to him after he buys me another drink.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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