Whoa Z and x make the same sound
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
