I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
Randomize
