you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize
