Banned from zoo.
Again?
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
Randomize
