He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
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You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
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We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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