Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
Come share oat with me in your robe
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
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