I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Randomize
