how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
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