i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
