Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
