Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
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