Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
either way he was missing a nipple.
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
Randomize
