SEEEEXXX PLEASE
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
Randomize
