Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
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