If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
Randomize
