tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
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