i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Randomize
