im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
