so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Randomize
