I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
Randomize
