Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
I wish the iPhone would register texts from 11:59 as "Last Year" instead of "Yesterday."
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Randomize