He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW!
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Randomize
