Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
Randomize
