the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
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