Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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