TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Randomize
