when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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