I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
Randomize
