trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
Randomize
