there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
Randomize
