There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize