Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
